WARNING: Do not give this to alreadycrazy people!
by Dejichan4444
Summary: Hungry and thirsty, Ban and Ginji walk into the Honky Tonk. Natsumi decides to let them have a little treat. Unfortunately...one of the new treats turns out to be a disaster for Ban! He should've listened to the title...


A/N: Well! This is my second GB fic! I hope you enjoy it! I tried to make it funny, cuz it was inspired by a VERY funny moment at my house...which happens every time I drink a can of Mountain Dew.

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_**WARNING: Do not give this beverageto already-crazy people...**_

The Honky Tonk received a new shipment of food and beverages, along with eating utensils and napkins, on a fine afternoon. There was nothing strange about it. There was a light breeze in the air, one that rustled the leaves that were on the trees. The sun was shining brightly, but not brightly enough to melt the residents of Earth. Little children and adults alike were enjoying this day to its greatest potential.

_**No one knew of the events that would occur that day. **_

"Wow, this stuff looks great!" Natsumi chirped as Paul quietly handed her the packages in the back. The man, commonly known as "Master", let a smile slip on to his face. Natsumi had such innocence to her. Natsumi graciously placed the package on the table and began to look through the contents, smiling from ear-to-ear. "I bet the customers will love it!" Paul chuckled and reached down for another package.

"The only real regular customers we have don't even pay," he reminded her gently. This was not meant to upset her, but merely to tease her and make her laugh. Paul succeeded. Natsumi let out a loud giggle and took a bottle out of the box.

"But still, I love it when they're happy and enjoy the food," Natsumi said. "And don't forget that painting they got us." She looked fondly at the painting that Ban and Ginji had given the Honky Tonk. Paul did the same, remembering the moment they barged in and gave it to them. It had been a marvelous moment for all of them.

"Yes, I know, but, as that idiotic electric boy one said, pride can't fill stomachs," Paul told her. "Neither can kindness. Without paying customers, we can't keep this place and we won't be able to treat them at all. Don't ever forget that." Natsumi frowned and continued to put the things in their proper places.

"But paying customers, their friends, always follow them, and their clients tip very well, too," Natsumi objected. She was determined to have Paul fully agree with her. "Besides, I'm sure they'll pay their tab eventually, when they get another good job."

"You do have a point, but I don't agree about the job thing," Paul admitted, scratching the back of his head. "I guess we just have to hope for the best, eh?" He winked at Natsumi, who grinned back at him.

"Yup." Natsumi finally got to the bottom of the package and politely asked Paul for the next one. Paul handed it to her, and the process repeated. Finally, they got to the last package. As Natsumi opened it, she was greeted by some rather odd objects.

Mountain Dew (1) cans. Twenty-four of them to be exact. Natsumi had never had one of them, so it caught her attention. Little did she know, they would cause much destruction and chaos later on.

"Who ordered those?" she asked, pointing at the cans while looking into Paul's eyes.

"Ah, I did," Paul said. "Be careful who you give them to, because…" Suddenly, a customer, a paying one, tapped Paul on the shoulder, which was very impolite. However, Paul had to attend to his customers no matter what. "What can I do for you, sir?"

"My daughter wants to know if you have any crayons, but she's too shy to come up to you and ask," the man explained. He was obviously a caring, albeit rude, father. "Do you have any?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I do," he said. "Come this way." He turned his attention to Natsumi for a moment, completely forgetting what he was telling her. "Finish unloading all the stuff. I'll be back in a few, kay?" Natsumi nodded and continued working.

As if on cue, Ginji and Ban, the Honky Tonk's only regulars, walked in. Ban looks hungry, but Ginji appeared more thirsty than hungry, strangely enough. After all, they usually were dirt poor and they hadn't come here in days. Natsumi's kind nature kicked in and she greeted them both with a smile.

"Hello, Ban and Ginji!" she said happily. "Can I get you anything? It's on the house today; just leave quickly and don't tell master." Ban and Ginji received the news with wide smiles.

"Thanks Natsumi-chan!" Ginji said, giving Natsumi a hug. Natsumi blushed until Ginji released her. Ban nodded, showing his pleasure in a less-physical and less-affection way.

"Can we have some sandwiches?" Ban asked, oddly in a good mood. "And some drinks?" Natsumi nodded and went to fetch the food while Ban and Ginji sat at the bar, waiting patiently.

"She's **really** nice, isn't she?" Ginji said, as if he had no cares in the world. He leaned back.

"Yeah, at least **she** cares about the well-being of her friends…," Ban said bitterly and he rolled his eyes.

"Ban-chan!" Ginji scolded. "Be nice! Master could've kicked us out of her permanently with the tab we have! We should be thankful!"

"Since when have I listened to you?" Ban raised his eyebrow, curious of the answer.

"Uh…well…" Ginji looked at the ceiling." Sometimes I can't tell if you listen or not, but I think since we met you heard what I was saying. Wait…Ban-chan…" Ginji looked surprised. He raised his voice and said, "ARE YOU DEAF, BAN-CHAN?"

"First of all, idiot, I meant: 'since when did I do what you said?'" Ban growled. Even after all the time they spent together, he was amazed by Ginji's stupidity sometimes… "And if I was deaf, I wouldn't be able to hear you even if you screamed loud enough for the Americans to hear you." He reached into his pocket and pulled out his liter and a carton of cigarettes. "You make me so frustrated, you idiot, that I have to smoke." He bonked the oblivious Ginji on the head with his free hand.

"Ow!" Ginji cried out. "Ban-chan, don't be so mean!" Ban ignored him and lit his cigarette. Ginji appeared hurt, but Ban knew it wasn't serious. Luckily, Natsumi came to them with two sandwiches and the twenty-four cans of Mountain Dew. Giving them all twenty-four of them appeared dumb, but Natsumi was sure they wouldn't take all of it and thought she'd leave the rest out for the customers to see.

_**She was dead wrong. **_

Ginji put two cans in each pocket, twelve in his bandanna, which he had randomly chosen to wear but was now holding, and ten in his hands. He looked like a comedy act of some sort. Ban looked at him like he was dancing in the streets in only his boxers, which could possibly happen, knowing Ginji.

"What the hell are you doing, moron?" Ban demanded, hitting Ginji on the head again, which almost caused Ginji to drop some of the cans. "We don't need all of them!"

"I wanna save them so we don't have to pester Natsumi-chan again for awhile," Ginji told Ban firmly. "We can live longer without food than water, (you told me that once, and I never forgot it) so I thought taking all of them would last us for a while. And then maybe Paul would be happier to see us next time, or less annoyed…"

"Your logic sucks, but I get your point," Ban said hastily, looking at Natsumi. "Well, thanks, we'll be going now." Ban picked up the sandwiches and the two partners walked out of the Honky Tonk, leaving Natsumi in a daze. Master would not be happy, she knew.

As luck would have it, Paul stepped out of the back just as Ginji and Ban were out of sight, having no clue what just happened. Natsumi just stared out the door. And stared. And stared.

Meanwhile, Ginji and Ban were inside the Lady Bug, cruising along. Ban was eating his sandwich slowly, so as to make it last a bit longer. It didn't really work, but he was too stubborn to admit it. Ginji had already finished his sandwich and was putting the cans of Mountain Dew on the car floor beneath his feet. Curious as to what the beverage tasted like, he took one single can.

**_It was the moment that changed everything._** Well…the moment didn't come until a minute later…

Ginji attempted to open the can, but then he realized he had forgotten how to. "Ban-chan!" he cried out, as if he were in the most dangerous situation ever and needed assistance immediately. "I can't get this open. Can you show me how again, please?" Ban groaned and took a drag before he aided his friend. After quickly re-teaching Ginji how to open a can, he continued to smoke and relax in his beloved car, having no interest whatsoever in what Ginji was about to consume.

**_Now, the moment that changed everything really happened._**

Ginji slowly brought the top of the can to his lips and drank some of the drink. After pausing to taste it, he put on a goofy smile. Apparently, he absolutely loved it. Ban had no idea of the terror that would soon befall him. Ginji finished the can in one gulp and moved on to the next one, saying, "Just one more, 'cause I'm super thirsty!"

Ten minutes later, all twenty-four cans were as empty as the Get Backers' wallets. Ginji licked his lips, satisfied with the beverage. Ban was now getting bored. He casually looked at Ginji to ask him a question. However, the question was never asked and was forgotten, because Ginji started to dance. Yes, you read correctly, dance.

"WEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" Ginji sang merrily, twirling on his toes and trying to not hurt himself. "I LOOOOOOOVE PAPA RANCH!" He hopped next to Ban and smirked playfully. "Did you know that Papa Ranch is like, this dude that, uh…like…" Ban just looked at him, stunned.

"Ginji…what the hell is wrong with you?" Ban asked in a very serious tone, one that usually sent shivers down Ginji's spine. This time, his partner was unaffected. That alone scared Ban to death.

"I just LOVE Mountain Dew!" the "electric eel" hollered. "Lookie!" He picked up an empty can and shoved it in Ban's face. "Is yummmmmy!" Grammar be damned, and Ginji was a bit…energetic. "And isssss….erm…..gaaaaa…..oooooood! Amd…BAN-CHAN, I LOVE YOU!" He attempted to kiss and hug Ban, but his attempt failed miserably. Ban pushed him away and looked devastated.

"What. The. Hell?" he breathed. Ban grabbed the can from Ginji's hand and examined it. His blood froze at the spot as he read the ingredients.

"Ginji…this isn't caffeine-free…," he whispered nervously and cautiously.

"Yup!" Ginji cheered and he swung the door open and started to dance some more, in a wider area. "WEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" he screamed. He was now talking to a pebble that was lying on the sidewalk and he seemed to be having a very in-depth discussion with it. This only disturbed Ban further

"And it has **lots** of sugar…," Ban continued, taken aback. He couldn't believe the words he was reading.

"Totally cool, man!" Ginji said as he humped the nearest tree, and then he fell to the ground dramatically.

"And…all sorts of other…complications…," Ban finished, shocked. "Ginji, how many of these did you drink?" He looked out of the car, trying not to faint because of what insanity he was seeing. Fortunately, or unfortunately, Ban didn't need to hear Ginji's answer. The two-dozen empty cans below him answered him instead. Ban noted to try to murder Natsumi and the creator of the horrible Mountain Dew for cursing him with watching a hyper-active idiot with tough bladder.

And a few minutes later, Ginji did, indeed, dance in the middle of the street in only his boxers, to many people's horror, including Ban's.

"…**_Fuck…,"_** Ban moaned, knowing he'd need Advil later on for a **very** severe headache.

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A/N: Thanks for reading, and please review! Thanks! Heh! 


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